Richard
Werner Mobile: 206-335-4020 www.richwerner.com
Objective A fry cook position where I can use my experience with vegetable oil to bring something new and exciting to McDonalds. Things i done · I flipped burgurs once at my uncles cookout for like 5 minutes straight without takin a drink. · This one time I deep fried 5 pickles a shoelace and 4 bottlecaps at the same time. · I can count to 10 on one hand. Ma calls em my magic fingers. · Once I drank vegetable oil and then ate a raw potatoes and pooped out french fries. Crinckle cut. · Throwin rocks at girls count for nuthin? Qualiticashions I thinks I do good fryin cuz I pays goods attention to details. Like one time I realized I was fryin my own hand after only like 2 minutes. Also you can use old fry oil for hair gel. It sticks real good. The smell reminds me of my mammy's house only with less amonia. Drawin skills I can draw somethin fierce. One time I drew a picture of my daddy. I even remembered the peg leg and extra back hump. He was darn proud of me. He even gave me an extra beatin with the chair leg for it. Experience State Penetentury June 2005-yesterday Inmate 223045 · I done made alot of liscence plates there. They gave me this neato bracelet, only I gotsta wears it on my ankle for like 6 months. They tol me it was a good luck bracelet. I am so lucky sept when it got itchy and I stuck my fry tong under it and it done cooked my leg. Deep Fried Fryin Fryer May 3 2003- May 10 2005 Cooky · I was lead on the fryer for a whole hour once. I almost got to be for more but when I mistook the mop strings for curly fries they got a lil upset so then I got to be incharge of watchin the red light blink on the fryer. That light sure does look perty. · I got an award for "Most Cigarette butts picked up in a parkin lot" one time. I done picked up 40. I only smoked half of em myself while pickin em up. County sewage April 1 2000- April 2 2002 Sanitizin guy I was lead strainer at the treatment plant. I done netted me lots of poops there. I only fell in like 4 times. · Once when I fell in I found 2 quarters and a bag of cocaine. I got to keep the baggie. · I got let go from there. They told me that you ain't posed to fish in there. Freelance
2003 · My friend Joey payed me a dollar once to let him punch me in the face 4 times. He did it more but I can't remember cuz I fell asleep or somethin. But when I woke up there was a dollar in my mouth and he even used it to wrap my teeth in it. He said I must grind my teeth in my sleep cuz somehow they fell out.
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2004
I was in tha instatusion this year so I don't remember much sept a few shock treatments
2005 · So far just my fry experience this year. One day I wanna be lead fryer for Mcdonalds cuz there is a clown there. I like them almost as much as the Hamburglar. He and I have the same striped suit on. Sept mine had a chain and a big xshiny ball on it and I got to break rocks with a hammer. I bet he is jelous. Educamation I got me a cetificate when I finished kindamagarten. I even made it to third grade. I know that cuz I count all the fingers on my right hand to remember what grade it was. References available upon the ability to remember the names of them folks I was bunked with in San Quentin.
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